F-I-N-E. The most commonly used word in small talk that actually carries the heaviest of weights when said a lot. We convince ourselves we are fine. We tell everyone we’re fine in order to slowly convince ourselves that we are in fact fine. But such a small one syllable word is said faster than our brain can even interpret or stop to evaluate. We toss it out in conversation with the knowledge of what our ancestors went through. We understand that things could be worse and sometimes we even dwell long enough that the worst becomes our own reality.
Humans are innately designed to be pessimistic and hesitant to new ideologies. Not by choice, but because this pessimism was once used to scare us away from danger so that we may survive. Survive to reproduce and carry on the human race. But here we are. And now we’re fine.
We have grouped together and dominated the globe for long enough that what would’ve been fine for our ancestors is now viewed as basic necessities or expected human rights. But this doesn’t mean we are in fact fine, does it? When walking into work on a Monday morning and you notice a coworker coming your way: “Hey how’s it going?” they say, to which we always respond “fine, and you?”. Because most of our parents instill gratitude into our personalities, we know to be grateful. Besides, gratefulness is the first step towards optimism. However, the word fine was just a mask for us to disguise the spaghetti of thoughts we have from our daily burnouts and overwhelming tasks.
Burnouts one after another, getting short, being overwhelmed, overstimulated, and anxious as hell. There is no escape from the mental prisons we build one negative thought-bar at a time. Why do we still insist on putting ourselves through this and disguising it as “fine”. What do we gain past the status of appearing strong when times are hard. I said earlier, we as a race, dominate the globe and changed our daily struggles into basic necessity and expected human rights but it still feels as we have a long way to go.
Every problem has a solution, but we are so caught up in constantly circling our daily tasks that now our daily tasks are an indicator of our mental health. Letting chores slide in order to focus on work? That’s fine. Letting family, friends, and the ones we love slip through our fingertips in order to be able to process the stressors from work? That’s fine. Giving up on your hobbies and things that brought joy to your life because you are in desperate need of some silence and rest? That’s fine.
Are you noticing the trend here yet? Let’s do away with fine. Let’s do away with allowing those we care about to reply “fine”. Let’s end the stigma that you’re weak if you share how you truly feel. Let’s all redefine and make a better “F-I-N-E”.